Stop Trying To Be Happy

Stop trying to be happy. Happiness is not the goal.

Happiness is an emotional response to how you think about things that happen outside you. Happiness is a reaction to external events.

When what happens exceeds your expectations, then you feel happy. For a moment. Then, you look at all that could be improved and move the bar of your expectations. Happiness is fleeting and shifting.

Furthermore, in many, if not most, cases, you have very little control of the external events you are watching, hoping they will exceed your expectations. If traffic is backed up, you are unhappy. If it is flowing smoothly, you are happy. But you are reacting to something you can't control—based on your thoughts and beliefs about that thing.

Happiness, then, should NOT be the goal. Something else should. Something that comes out of your purpose, your why-behind-the-why, the source from which you draw your life mission.

The goal should be an abiding, satisfying approach, not a pleasant reaction. The goal should be to develop something internal, not external. Not happiness.

Peace. Contentment. Joy.

They come from within you, and guide your actions. They drive you toward things; they are not a reaction coming from them.

I want to propose something I'm going to call a joyful approach. Stick around… There's a lot to say!