Other People's Expectations and YOUR Success

Success is personal. Except when it isn't.

Your goals sometimes depend on other people's expectations. When you want something controlled by others, then meeting expectations becomes your goal.

If your goals and personal expectations include something like getting a paycheck, then in order to be successful at that, you have to meet the expectations of the person offering to pay you.

The same is true about grades, licenses, or credentials. When YOUR goals for yourself include things like that, then the demands and expectations of someone else becomes, de facto, part of your goal.

Very rare it is that someone can entirely ignore external expectations.

What Is Success?

If you are going to be happy, it is YOUR goals and expectations that need to be met. Success is personal. Except when it isn't.

Success is can be defined as having the outcome of whatever you are doing meet or exceed the goals and expectations. When you do this, then you can say you are successful.

However, sometimes, people will put expectations on you. People will set goals that you feel compelled to met.

What happens if you work really hard at meeting someone else's goal? There is a real possibility that doing so will not result in the kind of satisfaction expected. Meeting someone else's goals doesn't always lead to happiness.

Make sure you are working to meet YOUR goals and to fulfill YOUR expectations.

Your Priorities Should Guide Your Plans - s3e24

Your decisions shouldn't be made in a vacuum. That might not be true. Maybe you are in outer space, and then they would be made in a vacuum.

Anyway, I was talking metaphorically. Never mind…

In the paradigm of mission, goals, and objectives, there is a concept that has been latent in my mind over the years, but one that I have never discussed directly. That is the concept that there are different areas of our lives that afford different levels of priority.

For instance, many people would say their personal health is more important than having a nice flower garden. On the other hand, putting food on the table for the family has probably a higher priority than does getting to the next level in a video game.

Higher level priorities get first dibs on the time available.

So, back to the mission, goal, objective concept.

Agreeing that everyone's life includes priorities and different areas, I'd argue that within each area, there are sub-priorities. In the area of "family" getting a new TV might be a lower priority than getting a new hot-water heater.

That accepted, we can move on to the actual point!

Whenever an opportunity comes along, assuming it fits within the overall life mission you have established, it is necessary to examine the effect of the opportunity on the different areas of your life.

If it hurts your family, but helps you with your on-line gaming friends, should you do it? But if it helps your family AND boosts your career, then maybe it is a better choice.

Looking at the effect of something on the different areas of your life should be an integral part of making decisions. If it undermines one area while bolstering another, then the priorities you assign to those areas needs to direct what you decide.

Preparation Is Vital For Success - s3e22

To be successful, you need to be ready for whatever is required. A part of a good plan is a preparation step. Preparation is the process of acquiring the skills, experiences, materials, and tools needed to complete the task at hand.

As you look to your horizons, whether they are related to your career, your education, or even socially, you need to anticipate what is needed to succeed (whatever you define as being successful). Then, you need to take the steps in the present to provide you with all the things you will need for the future. There are two types of things for which you need to prepare.

First, you need to prepare for those things you can anticipate. As you look ahead, where do you want to be? What do you need to do to get there? What do you need to learn? What tools do you need?

Second, you need to prepare for the unexpected. This is far more abstract. The old adage of being prepared for anything applies. What skills MIGHT you need? What experience PROBABLY would help you in the future? While this is vague, it is equally important; you never know what opportunities might come along, and having the right experiences and skills could make the difference between having a chance at something great or not.

Preparation is not always fun or exciting. But if you want to succeed in the future, it is a vital process that you need to always be thinking about.

Complete the Have-tos to Get to the Want-tos - s3e21

You gotta do what you gotta do so that you get to do what you want to do.